Let me just say - I completely agree that (if you can) breast feeding is the best possible way to feed your child for the first major period of their life. The World Health Orgabisation advises that you breast feed for the first 2 years of their life which seems a little excessive to me but hey if you can manage it - all the power to you.
One of the major reasons breast feeding gets pushed so vehemently in new mothers is purely because of hygiene - as long as you eat relatively healthy and often - you can provide your baby with all of its necessary nutrients and vitamin without having to worry about sterilising bottles, formula storage or water boiling.
All that said, let me tell you my experience - when Brandonpants was born, he wouldn't latch on to my nipples. He tried and kind of did on one of them but he just couldn't get much out before he became . . .unlatched. Apparently my nipples aren't ideal for breast feeding because theyre not long enough or don't protrude out far enough.
I can almost hear a nurse out there reading this and thinking "you must have been doing it wrong" well, imaginary nurse - I had 7 nurses trying to help me those first couple of days and nights and not one could get him to latch (this is where the bullying began) some even got super frustrated and were calling brandonpants lazy or were saying that I wasn't trying hard enough which was quite surreal. I wasn't at a dodgy hospital either, it's actually a sought out hospital but like all the hospitals - the midwives have it drilled into them that "breast is best" and god help anyone say otherwise.
I got sent home with no confidence whatsoever with how to feed this little guy properly and although its customary that newborns lose a little bit of weight their first week home, Brandonpants had lost too much and they allowed me to supplement his feeds with formula. I say allowed because the midwife that checked Brandon out had to clear it with a doctor before they would let me give him formula. . . In my own home. She then made an appointment for me for the following week to visit with a lactation consultant which gave me a nipple guard and some helpful tips but ultimately Brandon was still not getting all the milk he needed.
I found that I began to dread trying to feed my child, anxiety started to creep in everytime Brandonpants started to do his hungry cry. A nurse suggested I try pumping the milk out so my mum went and bought me an overly priced breast pump that looked like a foghorn and off I went manually pumping milk out for my hungry child. This worked for me for about a month - Brandonpants was gaining weight as he was supposed to but then of course this would have been too easy.
My nipples, I was told - would only hurt at the beginning and then as I used the pump more often - my nipples would extend and hurt less. . . They hurt from the beginning, what with strangers flicking them about and Brandonpants trying to desperately be fed and then with the pump - a truly horrible thing happened - my nipples were apparently not elastic enough and instead of stretching , started to crack and bleed. The anxiety started again whenever I had to feed my child because my nipple hurt so incredibly much, it hurt to wear any clothes at all what with any fabric feeling like molten lava on the sore bits.
The nurses told me to fight through the pain and that eventually they'll settle. I kept thinking this was what people meant that you have to suffer for your children, and then came the day that the milk I had pumped out was actually light pink in colour because of all the blood that come from my torturous milking, I told the nurses that I had to throw a batch of milk out because by the time I had finished - it looked like a batch of strawberry milk and smelt heavily of copper. The nurses told me that a little blood never hurt a baby and that I should have given it to him.
Now at this point I was getting so sick of being treated as if I was the most horrible person in the world and decided to research what the hell was going on. So lo and behold my baby won't actually explode or turn into jellyfish if I didnt breast feed. I decided, against the advice of the midwives (who tried to scare me in every way to dissuade me) that I was no longer going to breastfeed and stick with formula only.
Another hurdle was my mum who is ethnic and gave me the passive aggressive guilt trip about how it was ok if I couldn't give my baby the best start possible and that women these days were so weak and so on. . .
Now, in the spirit of providing an unbiased account - the formula journey was not an easy one either, the pharmacist recommended S-26 gold for my newborn and it gave him awful cramps and constipation and I was berating myself for switching to formula only to cause my munchkin pain. It turned out that S-26 gold has been known to cause constipation and bad gas with newborns according to a lot of worried mums on forums, so we switched to NAN ha gold and we have not had any issues for nearly 5 months! The only thing to make sure is that you sterilise bottles and teats and make sure you store the formula, bottles and teats in a dry clean place and you should not have any issues.
You know what the most important part is? My baby is nearly 6 months old and he is big and healthy and the only thing that he's had is a cold about 3 months ago and that was only because my whole family was getting the same cold at the time.
So look, I'm not saying defy your midwives with whatever you want because they do actually know what they're talking about and help a crazy amount of women each day with their newborns and infants. However, if like me, you've done your research and what is expected of you is not something that you feel you can continue without draining you emotionally or physically, or compromising your time with your baby, I recommend discussing it with your midwife first to explore all the options but ultimately - you have to make your own decision of what suits you and your baby better without compromising their health.
I feel confident that I chose the best option for my baby.
